
What Are Values, and How Are They Different From Goals?
Writer:
What is the difference between a goal and a value?
Goals are concrete. If you set your goals effectively, they are specific, achievable, and measurable (see How Can You Set Better Goals and Stick to Them?).
Values are more global. They define what is important to you, what you stand for, and how you want to live your life.
Values determine how you want to act on an ongoing basis. You cannot necessarily “achieve” a value, but you can live your life according to one.
Here are some examples:
If you want to enter a romantic relationship, date for a while, and get married, those are goals.
If you want to spend your life being loving and loyal, those are values.
If you want to earn a lot of money, save some for your kids to go to college, and take your family on lots of expensive vacations, those are all goals.
If you want to be supportive to your family, that's a value.
If you want to lose 10 pounds, build muscle, and eat healthier foods, those are all goals.
If you want your life to be full of self-care, that’s a value.
There are countless other potential core values including kindness, integrity, dependability, acceptance, bravery, generosity, joy, gratitude, independence, open-mindedness, resilience, trustworthiness, and authenticity.
Why is it important to identify your values?
Values are like a compass – they give you direction and keep you on track when you’re traveling.
Just as you’ll never get “all the way north” when following a compass, you’ll never be done following your values.
But as long as you’re following your values, you’ll know you’re going in the right direction and can feel great about that.
Your values can guide your goals and your choices. In the compass metaphor, your goals are like the sights you want to see on your trip.
Because values are never “achieved,” you can always go back to them.
For a goal like acing a midterm, you either achieve it or you don’t – and either way it’s over once you get your grade.
But pursuing values like working hard or personal growth is ongoing.
How can you identify your values?
Imagine it’s your 80th birthday – really picture this in your mind.
Imagine yourself surrounded by loved ones. Your closest, longest-term friend stands up to give a speech about you.
Which of your attributes would you want them to talk about? How would you want them to fill in this blank: “the best thing about <name> is, I could always count on them to be _____________.”
Think about these different areas of your life: work/education, relationships, play/leisure, and health. In each of those areas, fill in these blanks:
“In my work/education, I want to behave in ways that are ___________.”
“In my relationships, I want to behave in ways that are ___________.”
“In my play/leisure, I want to behave in ways that are ___________.”
“In regards to my health, I want to behave in ways that are ___________.”
Now, think about your “values” and make sure they’re yours.
Growing up, our values are often aligned with or the same as those of our parents.
For those leaving home and heading off to college, make sure that your values and goals are actually yours – not ones that others expect you to have.
You want to make sure that you’re living the life that you want and achieving what you want to achieve in college.
Your parents can be a compass for you earlier in life, but you also need to learn to navigate for yourself to feel like a successful adult.